Burning Barf

I'm going to put a warning here because Cleo is having some rather intense symptoms. If that kind of thing disturbs you, it okay to skip the serious part of this post. I will clearly mark the serious part to make sure you don't get disturbed. If this kind of thing does not bother you at all, it's okay to read on.

THE SERIOUS PART. 

This morning, Cleo vomited up green stuff in the snow. She also had bloody diarrhea, and I could see the blood on her fur afterwards. She is drowsy, but the vet in our town is closed till January 4th, and we aren't able to wait that long. 

End of serious part

After Cleo barfed in the basement this afternoon, it was cleaned up with soap. But when I walked into the basement it smelled like rotten apples, so Dad put the paper towels he had used to clean in the fireplace and lit it, and then the whole house smelled like burning barf. 

So I went upstairs to save the world by spraying the entire house with mint cleaner spray, except the spray was nowhere to be found, so I went into the bathroom and found my mom's Birchwood Pine Body Spray, which was enough. I sprayed all around the living room, in the hallway next to the basement, and in the office where I work. 

The thing about Birchwood Pine is that it works. Like, as of today, I'm only buying fragrances that have the ability to do mighty sprays with a comforting scent that easily covers up burning barf. Like, I'm not using Miss Dior unless it helps with that kind of thing. Christian Dior should make a line of fragrances designed specifically for countering the stench of flaming dog barf. 

He should also make a perfume that's gentle on you and your plants and animals but not on sprays of explosive poop. Has someone explosively pooped in your snow, backyard, floor, etc.? Just spray on some  No More Explosive Poop Fragrance Mist and the job is finished. In fact, it works so well it looks like an AI video, but it isn't. You know what? It works so well, it counts as a paranormal experience. 

Wait, I should invent a bunch of fragrances. In my next post.