If you saw my last post, you'll understand the reason why I only buy perfumes that can cover up the smell of burning barf. I came up with a series of totally awesome perfumes that will help counter such stenches, and they also smell great. I settled on 12 ideas so that we had a variety. I was thinking, and we could call it Alpha Soup Anti-Barf Fragrances. Or just Alpha Soup.
Idea 1: Spicy Trees: A spicy, citrusy, tree-y scent to immediately mask the stench, so you can smell an exotic aroma of spices and pine trees every time someone barfs. Think "When life barfs, let the pines clap back."
Idea 2: Rescue Spritz Royale: Blends warm scents of bergamot and mango with sweet touches of rosewater and flowers that gets sweeter as the spritz progresses. Luxury when life is gross. It also includes mint and vanilla for a refreshing sweetness that ever clings to the air. It has positive affirmations written on the back of the bottle that say stuff like, "It's okay. Barf sucks. It'll smell great today now. By the way, I love your outfit." It'd be awesome.
Idea 3: The Anti-Puke Elixir: Pineapple and ginger give the first impression, clearing out the barf. Vanilla and pine dance along and tell a story. "Hasta la vomit." It sings.
Idea 4: Disaster Chic: You'll first smell bergamot when you spray this, which distracts you from the smell of puke. Then it moves along to mint and watermelon--simple yet classy. Because emergencies deserve to smell awesome.
Idea 5: Puke Proof Potion: The strong fragrance of tangerine and spices obliterates barf while the lavender creates a gentle smell. Honestly, this one is so awesome the military could use it. But does that mean we won't be allowed to use it anymore?
Idea 6: Flaming Barf Won't Exist Now: A mix of lime, lemon, cinnamon, lavender, and orange. Cozy fragrances so that vomit won't be detected by your nostrils. Also, your house is gonna smell awesome, and your guests probably won't even notice that mess of your kitchen.
Idea 7: So The Apocalypse Will Smell Better: Flash flood? Alien invasion? Wildfire? Puking? Whichever deathly event is going on, make it feel better with So The Apocalypse Will Smell Better. Mint and orange give off optimism. Lavender soothes. Cinnamon helps you be hopeful. "Killer events stink. But this perfume doesn't."
Idea 8: Cleo&Fido Deluxe Doggie De-stress Spray: Dogs love the scent of vanilla, so we have a soothing vanilla spray to help soothe them when they're barfy. Just vanilla mist with a touch of bergamot. Spray near the dog when they are stressed or hurting. You can spray it on them gently but only if they want to. Do not spray in their face.
Idea 9: Jellybean Sweet: Inspired by by two favourite jellybean flavours, lemon and cinnamon, I blended them together with vanilla to top it off. BOOM! Disasters feel sweet like jellybeans now.
Idea 10: Izzy's Favourite Scent: If my best friend Izzy likes to eat these flavours, then she'll love it when they get rid of her stinky brother's stench! White chocolate, lemon, vanilla and lavender combine. Just spray it when the brother forgot his deodorant and all is well!
Idea 11: Exotic Fruit 'n' Flora: Roses, petunias, mango, orange, cinnamon, and mint. It's a tropical party that counters puke stench!
Idea 12: Bye Barf: Lime, lemongrass, rose, and lily of the valley.
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